Funniest bash.org quotes

Edwin · Post by **Edwin** » Tue May 16, 2006 7:40 pm

<Ich> I have passed the transitional stage of internet geekhood
<Ich> I was cashiering at work today, and was punching in the code for plums, which is 4040.
<Ich> and the 0 key doesn't work this well, so I punched it in wrong.
<Ich> and the machine flashed up "Item Not Found: 404"
<Ich> and I actually laughed out loud

JK-47 · Post by **JK-47** » Tue May 16, 2006 9:00 pm

Edwin wrote:<Ich> I have passed the transitional stage of internet geekhood
<Ich> I was cashiering at work today, and was punching in the code for plums, which is 4040.
<Ich> and the 0 key doesn't work this well, so I punched it in wrong.
<Ich> and the machine flashed up "Item Not Found: 404"
<Ich> and I actually laughed out loud

Lmfao

jks · Post by **jks** » Tue May 16, 2006 9:39 pm

<bubbleboo> i think 0's and 1's in binary should be replaced with 6's and 9's
<bubbleboo> would be much more entertaining

<ShoveX> beerman would you have gay sex for 2 million dollars?
<@Beerman> with who
<@Beerman> and do I have to pay all at once
<@Beerman> or can I pay in instalments

<rhyann> hey i got a floppy with a virus and i wana now if its ok to put it next to the other floppys or do i gotta wait for it to get better to put it back in the box

<BlackDeth> did you know i'm sitting on my toilet right now
<BlackDeth> taking a crap
<myhero> :L
<BlackDeth> i have been this whole conversation
<BlackDeth> brb wiping
*** myhero changes topic to '<BlackDeth> brb wiping'
<SD-Washu> erm k thats just wrong
<SD-Washu> you're not supposed to irc or call ppl from teh fucking bathroom
<SD-Washu> i dont fucking care if you are joking
<ryo-ohki> I do it all the time. :/
<BlackDeth> i'm back on the couch
<BlackDeth> i dont talk to people on the phone when i'm on the toilet
<BlackDeth> because they can hear the gruesome details

Rallos · Post by **Rallos** » Tue May 16, 2006 9:46 pm

jks wrote:<rhyann> hey i got a floppy with a virus and i wana now if its ok to put it next to the other floppys or do i gotta wait for it to get better to put it back in the box

jks · Post by **jks** » Tue May 16, 2006 9:47 pm

<@_aa_> I need more friends
<@_aa_> good ones
<@_aa_> instead of bad friends
<@_aa_> but I guess there's no such thing as bad friends
<biVulate> aa: join a fraternity

<@_aa_> I said friends not people who will super glue my penis to a milk crate when I'm asleep

I almost fell out of my chair at this one.

RaVNzCRoFT · Post by **RaVNzCRoFT** » Wed May 17, 2006 12:38 pm

(Mootar) morons.
(Mootar) these people who live in my apartment complex are connected to my wireless
(Mootar) they must think they're super-cool hackers by breaking into my completely unsecure network
(Mootar) unfortunatly, the connection works both ways
(Mootar) long story short, they now have loads of horse porn on their computer

<Fulgore> whats the complement to a 43 degree angle?
<sparks> My you're looking "acute" today
<Fulgore> fuck you

<kyourek> There was a 23% drop in temperature.
<nappyjallapy> That's almost 25%!
<kyourek> ... That was one of the most worthless comments I've ever heard.

<Insomniak`> Stupid fucking Google
<Insomniak`> "The" is a common word, and was not included in your search
<Insomniak`> "Who" is a common word, and was not included in your search

Jakefeb3: do you know a turtles only weakness?
AvatarOfSolusek: no
Jakefeb3: there weakness is they cant roll over when they are on their backs
AvatarOfSolusek: lol
Jakefeb3: now i have a plan
Jakefeb3: if i duck tape 2 turtles together they are unstoppable

<Raize> can you guys see what I type?
<vecna> no, raize
<Raize> How do I set it up so you can see it?

<Polytope> tetris is so unrealistic

V0Lt4Ge · Post by **V0Lt4Ge** » Wed May 17, 2006 1:28 pm

RaVNzCRoFT wrote:
Jakefeb3: do you know a turtles only weakness?
AvatarOfSolusek: no
Jakefeb3: there weakness is they cant roll over when they are on their backs
AvatarOfSolusek: lol
Jakefeb3: now i have a plan
Jakefeb3: if i duck tape 2 turtles together they are unstoppable

Hahaha!

JK-47 · Post by **JK-47** » Wed May 17, 2006 2:09 pm

Quote Ravnzcroft
quote<Fulgore> whats the complement to a 43 degree angle?
<sparks> My you're looking "acute" today
<Fulgore> **** you

LMFAO i love that one

imgettionowned · Post by **imgettionowned** » Wed May 17, 2006 2:46 pm

<glome> Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar?!
<content> glome stole the cookie from the cookie jar!
<glome> Who me?!
<content> Yes you!
<glome> Couldn't be!
<content> Then WHO?!!
<glome> Woody stole the cookie from the cookie jar!
*** glome has been kicked by DrWoody (fuck you i didn't touch the motherfucking cookie, bitch)

That's fucken great

V0Lt4Ge · Post by **V0Lt4Ge** » Wed May 17, 2006 3:00 pm

<turno> I want to fuck Michelle's brains out with my huge fucking ****, over and over again .. and then her sister can come and join us too.
<Seeker> Err turno, your mom reads the quotes on bash.org?
<turno> I'll fucking KILL YOU! !
<Seeker> Your mom does work for the church ? If she reads what you just said she'd be pretty angry right?
<turno> Dude you have no fucking clue, don't seriously... you'd be ruining my life.
<Seeker> Don't worry, I won't post it.
[Privmsg] <Seeker> Hey dude, I'm gonna paste something - will you post it on bash.org?
[Privmsg] <opiate> the turno thing? haha you fucking bastard!!
[Privmsg] <Seeker> hehe his mom's gonna fucking kill him, drag him to that church they go to and get the priest to sodomise him.
[Privmsg] <opiate> yeah and then he's gonna come fucking kill us, still I reckon it's worth it;)
[Privmsg] <turno> You're not gonna post it are you ? Please don't .. I'm begging you.
[Privmsg] <Seeker> I'm not gonna post it:) and even if I did she'd never know that your nick turno was her son Michael Savu .
[Privmsg] <turno> *phew* spose you have a point

ROFL.

EDIT:

<MooseOnDaLoose> Hey Mike
<goatboy> what?
<MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.
<goatboy> er?
<MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.
<goatboy> and?
<MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.
<goatboy> ...
<MooseOnDaLoose> Pussy.
<goatboy> i dont get it
<MooseOnDaLoose> AND YOU NEVER WILL.
<goatboy> bastard

He's saying Puss with a y at the end.

<Sui88> 67% of girls are stupid
<V-girl> i belong with the other 13%

<studdud> what the fuck is wtf

<h|tler> HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU TELL THAT I'M 13 BY LOOKING AT WHAT I'M WRITEING?????????????????????????????????????????????????????

<Raven> I tried setting my hotmail password to penis.
<Raven> It said my password wasn't long enough.

"The pen is mighter..."

imgettionowned · Post by **imgettionowned** » Wed May 17, 2006 3:15 pm

<anamexis> oh man
<anamexis> I was opening a coke, right
--> Beefpile (~mbeefpile@cloaked.wi.rr.com) has joined #themacmind
<anamexis> and it exploded
<anamexis> ALMOST all over my keyboard
<anamexis> but I got it away just in time
<-- Beefpile has quit (sick fuckers)
<anamexis> :<

bloodninja: Baby, I been havin a tough night so treat me nice aight?
BritneySpears14: Aight.
bloodninja: Slip out of those pants baby, yeah.
BritneySpears14: I slip out of my pants, just for you, bloodninja.
bloodninja: Oh yeah, aight. Aight, I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: Oh, I like to play dress up.
bloodninja: Me too baby.
BritneySpears14: I kiss you softly on your chest.
bloodninja: I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. You turn into a real beautiful woman.
BritneySpears14: Hey...
bloodninja: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 chicken of the Infinite.
BritneySpears14: Funny I still don't see it.
bloodninja: I spend my mana reserves to cast Mighty F*ck of the Beyondness.
BritneySpears14: You are the worst cyber partner ever. This is ridiculous.
bloodninja: Don't f*ck with me bitch, I'm the mightiest sorcerer of the lands.
bloodninja: I steal yo soul and cast Lightning Lvl. 1,000,000 Your body explodes into a fine bloody mist, because you are only a Lvl. 2 Druid.
BritneySpears14: Don't ever message me again you piece of ****.
bloodninja: Robots are trying to drill my brain but my lightning shield inflicts DOA attack, leaving the robots as flaming piles of metal.
bloodninja: King Arthur congratulates me for destroying Dr. Robotnik's evil army of Robot Socialist Republics. The cold war ends. Reagan steals my accomplishments and makes like it was cause of him.
bloodninja: You still there baby? I think it's getting hard now.
bloodninja: Baby?
--------------
BritneySpears14: Ok, are you ready?
eminemBNJA: Aight, yeah I'm ready.
BritneySpears14: I like your music Em... Tee hee.
eminemBNJA: huh huh, yeah, I make it for the ladies.
BritneySpears14: Mmm, we like it a lot. Let me show you.
BritneySpears14: I take off your pants, slowly, and massage your muscular physique.
eminemBNJA: Oh I like that Baby. I put on my robe and wizard hat.
BritneySpears14: What the f*ck, I told you not to message me again.
eminemBNJA: Oh ****
BritneySpears14: I swear if you do it one more time I'm gonna report your ISP and say you were sending me kiddie porn you f*ck up.
eminemBNJA: Oh ****
eminemBNJA: damn I gotta write down your names or something

<[TN]FBMachine> i got kicked out of barnes and noble once for moving all the bibles into the fiction section

AAHAHAHHA

V0Lt4Ge · Post by **V0Lt4Ge** » Wed May 17, 2006 3:37 pm

Scud: The other day, in the park, I was wondering why frisbees look bigger and bigger as they get closer to you
Scud: And then it hit me

The_Hushed_Casket · Post by **The_Hushed_Casket** » Wed May 17, 2006 4:21 pm

This is quite possibly the funniest thing I've ever read:

Bash.org wrote:<WiLdSeXyPrInCeSs> i luv guyz where would they be wifout us gals???
<XeNoX> Still in the Garden Of Eden you gullible *COUGH*

ExileLord · Post by **ExileLord** » Wed May 17, 2006 6:57 pm

I've read most of these quotes a long time ago. You guys should go to bash more often.