OMG WTF H4X BBQ! I need some advice URGENTLY.

rossmum · Post by **rossmum** » Tue Aug 16, 2005 10:11 pm

You don't know that...

Anyways, I think you're wrong, but either way it's worth a shot.

So any ideas on what to say? I'm having trouble stringing together 2 words in my head here, let alone whole sentences while talking to her...

RaVNzCRoFT · Post by **RaVNzCRoFT** » Wed Aug 17, 2005 6:36 am

Walk up to her, be cool, and say the exact same thing that's in your signature.

I'm gonna pwn you. And you know it.

Cheech|N|Chong · Post by **Cheech|N|Chong** » Wed Aug 17, 2005 7:04 am

find like a chance to talk wit her, and when u get that chance do it, ask her questions about something she's doing or thats happening in ur class and take it from there..after that question ask her questions about herself THAN keep talkin!

Phenomena · Post by **Phenomena** » Wed Aug 17, 2005 9:39 am

Hunter wrote:You don't know that...

Anyways, I think you're wrong, but either way it's worth a shot.

So any ideas on what to say? I'm having trouble stringing together 2 words in my head here, let alone whole sentences while talking to her...

but im not it... its impossible to love someone without knowing them, lust is just an imitation of love that will ALWAYS end with someone being hurt.

before you go jumping in with ideas of love before you get to know her, walk up to her and get to know her, become her friend before you become her boyfriend....

M9 HE-DP Grenade · Post by **M9 HE-DP Grenade** » Wed Aug 17, 2005 11:16 am

actually heres a good tip,when you talk to her pretend you dont care if you look good in front of her,it works alot better that way because u wont feel as nervous.

btw i get lucky alot,i never really have to go after things i want,things just happen to me and things usually turn out right for me.

dont get your hopes up though,i prolly have exceptional luck

btw phenom your sig is pwnage

DECOY · Post by **DECOY** » Wed Aug 17, 2005 12:30 pm

Stick with the basics.

Body language speaks louder than words.
Be friendly.
Smile dont scowl.
Say Hi when you pass by. ( dont just stand there leering....Creepy )
Make sure you pass by once in a while.
Dont pass by too much....(stalker)

Watch for signals. If at any point she gives you the finger and sprays you with mace....This is a signal, proceed no further.

M9 HE-DP Grenade · Post by **M9 HE-DP Grenade** » Wed Aug 17, 2005 12:43 pm

Indeed,body language is louder than words

Locke · Post by **Locke** » Thu Aug 18, 2005 10:13 am

Now for a special segment on
"Yomama's tips, for picking up chicks"

Welcome back to this weeks edition of Yomama's tips, for picking up chicks". Last week we had veegie, nick, and Iron_forge come out to the studio and learn some lessons on picking up chicks. It didnt go so well. As the 'ol syaing goes "Not everyone can be a winner".
So this is what I promise to be a great show today. Were bringning in Hunter. Hunter is having problems with a girl at school. So, he naturaly came to me.

Me:So Hunter, do you even know this girl? Or is it just a girl you would like to meet?
Hunter: Well, its a girl I would like to get to know better. Mb become good friends if you know what I mean
Me: Im not sure you even know what you mean
*Cues laughter
Me:Anyway, my advice. Get to know her. Get to know her friends. And especialy get to know her best friend. If the girls best friend doesnt like you, your chances severly drop. The best friend is like a huge concrete wall, and behind that wall is the girl you like. So once you become friends with "The wall" you will be allowed in.
Hunter:So your saying her best friend is a huge, fat, wall?
Me: Your missunderstanding. The best friend usaly weeds out guys who they think shouldnt be talking to her best friend.
Once your in though, your set up. Find some common intrests. When you talk about yourself, do not say you spend all your time on a computer asking random nerds to help you with your love life. That is an instant ticket to lonly ville, population you.
Hunter: But what should I talk about? Makeup?
Me: No. Talking about makeup leads to two things.
1. She could think your gay
2. She could take it as an insult that you think she isnt pretty and needs makeup.
Just let he do the talking. Listen to what she has to say and dont keep thinking dirty thoughts when your around her. Yes, we know what you do at night and we are very ashamed of you.
*Audiance "Gasp"
Were going to take a quick comercial break, stay tuned.

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Ok, were back with Hunter. He's a comptuer obsessed nerd trying to live out in the real world and get a date with a chick.
Me: After getting to know her for a while, and I dont mean for 5 min. Buy her something. Girls love money. Especialy your money. If your cheap around her, she will start looking for someone else who has a bigger budget. Buy her a gift for no reason at all. Find out the one thing she loves, and get it for her. No matter the cost. Hand it to her in front of all her friends, thats the key. Possible outcomes include
1. She hugs you. If that happens, it shows that she isnt afraid to be with you with her friends.
2. She accepts it but starts looking at the ground fully aware of your intensions. In other words, you lose.
3. She says "Gifts like this also get me horny, lets go over there and...", I'll let you figure it out

3 is not likely to happen. I know thats what your hoping for, but believe me it doesnt work like that.

Asuming she hugs you, don't ask her out there. Girls at that point feel as if your "buying them". Just go on as usual for a week or so. Keep shooting her a glance every chance you get. Be Macho around her. Hold the door open for her. Carry her bags. Be nice to her. Walk her home from school.

She will start lookingh into your eyes more. Looking at you in general more. Spending more time with you. Talking to you every chance she gets. At this point, shes hooked. Dont hesitate after this. If you keep a girl waiting, they will forget you and move on. Dont be afraid of rejection. Just ask her out. Simple as that. She will %80 of the time say yes.

And after that, its all up to you.
Hunter: Wow, I never thought of that. How can I ever repay you?
Me: I take visa
*Audience Laughs

Tune in next week where were bringing in jks to help him out.

Patrickssj6 · Post by **Patrickssj6** » Thu Aug 18, 2005 11:31 am

RaVNzCRoFT · Post by **RaVNzCRoFT** » Thu Aug 18, 2005 12:15 pm

Yomama wrote:Toon in next week where were bringing in jks to help him out.

rofl I'll be there

wes · Post by **wes** » Thu Aug 18, 2005 4:18 pm

Yomama wrote:He's a comptuer obsessed nerd trying to live out in the real world and get a date with a chick.

hahahahhaa lmao

M9 HE-DP Grenade · Post by **M9 HE-DP Grenade** » Thu Aug 18, 2005 4:24 pm

Yomama wrote: 3 is not likely to happen. I know thats what your hoping for, but believe me it doesnt work like that.

nice one lol

rossmum · Post by **rossmum** » Thu Aug 18, 2005 9:48 pm

Phenomena wrote:
Hunter wrote:You don't know that...

Anyways, I think you're wrong, but either way it's worth a shot.

So any ideas on what to say? I'm having trouble stringing together 2 words in my head here, let alone whole sentences while talking to her...
but im not it... its impossible to love someone without knowing them, lust is just an imitation of love that will ALWAYS end with someone being hurt.

before you go jumping in with ideas of love before you get to know her, walk up to her and get to know her, become her friend before you become her boyfriend....

No, last time I checked lust was like, 'wow I wanna get this chick into bed'. I mean, that would be awesome, but that's not all I want.

And some (extremely) bad news. I was going to go talk to her at lunch but my so-called *friends* show up. First, they try drag me down and force me to ask her out. But alas, I grab a tree as firmly as I can (next time, I'll try grab hold of something less rough). Failing that, they try to ask her out before I can, and just generally pissed her off. So she ran off to the canteen with her friends, and here's me left with a bunch of pricks standing there lauhging at me, chanting "Ross has a girlfriend, Ross has a girlfriend..." What dicks. A few of my friends didn't do anything, but still it would have been nice if they had made *SOME* attempt at helping me.

So now, I have no idea how she will react to me going up and talking to her. I was thinking of first off apologising for my fucking retarded *friends* annoying her, then going from there.

And Yomama, I actually have no interest in playing games anymore, so I'm not sure about the whole 'computer-obsessed nerd' thing...

wes · Post by **wes** » Thu Aug 18, 2005 9:53 pm

Hunter wrote:"Ross has a girlfriend, Ross has a girlfriend..."

rossmum · Post by **rossmum** » Thu Aug 18, 2005 11:07 pm

Well, one of the guys who did it thought he heard her or one of her friends say she wanted to go out with me, but I wouldn't even trust him with something I wanted to get rid of so I don't believe him.

Oh, well... *prays*

JK-47 · Post by **JK-47** » Thu Aug 18, 2005 11:39 pm

M9 HE-DP Grenade wrote:Indeed,body language is louder than words

what if he cant use body language, i guess hes gonna have to scream REALLY loud to outmaster body language.
and this is off topic just for like 2 seconds....

WHY does everyone say "indeed" here? its starting to hammer in my head, its like E.T. goes to school lol

rossmum · Post by **rossmum** » Thu Aug 18, 2005 11:54 pm

Ask mac_user, he started it.

Anyways, any ideas on what to say and/or how to not get nervous?

JK-47 · Post by **JK-47** » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:02 am

what works for me is just think... shes gonna say yes or no thats it or think of the person as someone uve known for a while....

dunno if this will work for u but it works just fine for me

rossmum · Post by **rossmum** » Fri Aug 19, 2005 12:34 am

Yeah, I could try that, but I don't think it would work for me. I turn into a nervous wreck around girls I really like.

JK-47 · Post by **JK-47** » Fri Aug 19, 2005 1:16 am

Hunter wrote:
Anyways, any ideas on what to say

ill tell u once i get an email from an annoying girl who always tells me what she wants in guys lol